A thank you note...

After attending the funeral of my First Mother-in-Law -- not too awkward, as my First Husband and I seem to be on friendly terms now -- I came home and penned a note to my Second Mother In Law who celebrated her 81st birthday on the day of the funeral.

There's nothing like a funeral to remind you how short life is!

I haven't seen Barbara (MIL 2nd) for a long time, but we do ask after each other through our mutual contact, my son, her grandson. My note was just a one page thank you as I come to recognize how difficult it can be to be a Good Mother in Law -- which Barbara was.

As was Rosemary (MIL 1st). I have seen her a few times over the years, staying in touch through our mutual contact, my first son, her first grandson. I saw her just two summers ago, but she was suffering from the effects of Parkinson's. She didn't recognize me - her face lit up, though, when I explained I was my son's mother. She recognized his name, and a familiar smile spread across her face.

How I wish I had told her before then what a wonderful Mother In Law she was to me - I don't know that it would have mattered as much to her as it would have to me, to have let someone special know what they meant to me. I hope she knew it.

All two of my MIL's have wonderful relationships with their grandchildren - I think that is one aspect of being a good MIL. I'm wondering if it is even possible to be a good MIL without being a good grandmother, and vice versa....